Okay let me start a brief intro and catch up on what has been preoccupying my heart and mind for the past year.
I had a love that ended around 9 months ago. He was my first love and lover and my bestest of friends. We were together for 8 and a half years nearly 9 but the last few months of our relationship was cloudy so I wouldn't consider them part of that.
It was definitely great, a great adventure where I learnt a lot of things about myself, himself, others and general life of togetherness. We practically grew up together, a time of adolescence and I think that's what eventually parted us. We grew separately (in my eyes only as he always argues against this) as I think this period of anyones life is when you grow up as a person and develop self worth, understanding and knowing.
We first met when I was 18 and he was 20. We had plenty of highs and lows and I never regret a single moment even the worst as it was our experience.
GJ LOVE: 2002-2011
We are still in contact... by email (how very formal). I try not to 'be friends' as I think it will be weird to be good friends and to know what we are up to, I don't want to create any emotional attachment with him that'll only create complications so best keep a distance. Who knows we might one day. It's over between us so I don't see why we have to. That's my reason and my decision on that maybe because I'm worried if feelings are still there it will only grow and make things more complicated which I don't want. Still to this day I think I made the right decision, I haven't missed him as such or gone into sudden depression which I was expecting to happen at some point but I've done well for the past 9 months and haven't had it yet so I guess I'm not heart broken!? I do miss the companion, being in love, laughing, arguing, going on an adventure with someone you care and love the most in your life. I MISS LOVE. I miss the happiness one person can give you and the pride you feel for making someone else happy!
We say hello or pour out our feelings or past thoughts to each other now and again because you can't just completely cut out someone who you have been intimate with and that close with for that long. So this I understand.
Anyway that's that. I said I will keep it brief. I'm sure I'll be coming back and forth on this subject of my first love now and again when I post something of relevance to it. There are just too much to mention if I were to paint you the whole story of my first love. It'll all come out eventually, bit by bit.
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